A few months ago I wandered onto the bulletin boards at ABCFlash, the supposed "Premier Website for Asian American News and Entertainment" and boy, was it an eye-opening experience. Apparently, people aren't happy with the general portrayal of Asian-Americans in the US media these days. While this situation is an obvious problem, it unfortunately is spawning some annoying and sometimes, just downright bizarre, thought patterns among the AA's that frequent the boards. Anti-American sentiment is up as a bunch of people believe that the whole "melting pot" description of the US is just a load of crap and the world would be better off if Asians stuck to interactions with only other Asians, whites with whites, blacks with blacks, etc. I wouldn't mind their viewpoints so much if these same people actually showed any inclination to practice what they preach and go BACK to Asia since they apparently don't like where they are now. These people even think that they're the majority now. God, I hope not. Okay, there were 2 people who were brave enough to say that once they finished obtaining their US university degrees, they would immediately hightail it to China where somehow everything is magically better. However the impression I got from these two was that their definition of better stems from the fact that they won't be a minority in China and that China, unlike the US, doesn't mess with other country's internal affairs. Stealing a line from Dr. Evil, "Riiiiggghhhttt....." While love of your race and culture is fine and dandy, being too one-sided about it is just a pain in everyone's ass.

Not surprisingly, some of these people also seem to be closet conspiracy theorists. Anything to make the US look bad. Well, here's another one for ya. Everyone knows how US fast food has literally exploded into the Asian marketplace right? Let's take McDonald's for instance. Do you remember years ago, when most of us were still kids, what McDonald's apple pies were like? These elliptical, deep-fried, tubes of liquid burning death that was oh so good? (Well I liked them at least. ;-p) So what if the crust looked like someone took bubbling grease and freeze-dried it and taking a bite into one of these things would result in a molten apple mixture marking a fiery path down your esophagus? It didn't matter that just thinking about one of those things would thicken your arteries by a good centimeter or two. Eventually, they were replaced by a healthier alternative which was nowhere near as good as the original. Now it's some softer, doughy crust that just doesn't quite cut it. As if making the apple pies healthier would result in a slimmer American. Uh huh. Anyway, guess where the old apple pies are still being offered? That's right, here in good ol' Taiwan. Good for my tastebuds, bad for my health. And even more insidious is the fact that they not only have apple pies, every now and then they'll have pineapple and blueberry as well. What gall.

But, you all know what this means, right? For those of you innocents out there, the big picture is this: death by apple pie. That's right, everyone knows that despite the dearth of any substantial Asian role models, Asian people suck up Western culture like a giant Hoover vacuum. After a couple years of blood-congealing fast food, 90-channel cable television, and Hollywood "blockbuster" movies, what will become of Asians? That's right, they'll be just like those lazy, fat-ass Americans. Those bastards. How dare they do this to us?

*sigh* There's just too much ignorance, stupidity and hate in the world these days but I guess I didn't really have to tell you that eh? What do you think? Is a melting pot of cultures a good or a bad thing? Are people really upset about losing their sense of identity or is it just one of a myriad of cheap copouts that is all too pervasive in today's society? Oh well, I think I'll go get me an apple pie.